Thursday, January 30, 2014

The Creep Out Factor

This close to Valentine’s Day, it is easy to believe you have met Mr. Right or want to meet Mr. Right. If true soul mates come together, shouldn’t everything work out right? It does in the movies. Well, actually sometimes as women we are so focused on the result that we creep the guy out big time.

Take a stroll down memory lane and think about a few guys you really liked and had happily ever after potential, but vanished off your screen. Dating is strange because people are often looking for reasons not to date people as oppose to continue dating them.

Decide if you have been guilty of any of these behaviors.

1.       Chatterbox. Most women do talk more than men.  A nervous woman might even talk more than normal.  It is okay not to talk too. Give your date a chance to talk. Ask a man questions throwing the ball in his court. 

2.       Okay on my Own Gal. This woman spends most of the date talking about why she’s great on her own and how her life is marvelous.  She doesn’t care if she’s ever a part of a couple.  In an effort to sound confident, she just comes off twisted. The date will feel played and will avoid future encounters. 

3.       The Social Media Stalker. This female sends endless tweets, photos, and pins that she thinks will keep her date thinking about her. He’s thinking all right, weird. It’s better to be mysterious and send almost nothing. Maybe one per week to let him know you’re thinking about him. If he doesn’t reciprocate, get a clue.

4.        Being Too Available. This gal is desperate to catch a man and volunteers to do crazy stuff. On a first date that man mentions he’s in charge of the company picnic, she offers to help.  

5.       Appearance matters. Many men decide not to date a woman because of how she dressed for their initial date.  Before you think this is unfair, consider your reaction when the man you agreed to meet at an upscale Italian restaurant shows up in cargo shorts, tank top and flip-flops. These clothes aren’t bad for walking on the beach, but they don’t suit a dinner date.

6.       Lying. If a topic comes up you don’t want to talk about. Don’t.  Say you don’t want to talk about it. Go to the bathroom. Change the topic, but don’t lie.

7.       The Important Gal- Have you ever been out with a guy who carries on a non-stop conversation about how great he was. Imagine that same person as a woman. 

8.       The Inconsiderate Date.  She’s late to the date. If her date drives to her house, she’s not ready.  She’s miffed when she has to stroll into a darkened theatre.  Somehow, she’s unaware of people around her as she chats loudly on her cellphone or continues to watch social media updates on her phone.  She doesn’t try to make conversation, but instead finds fault with the traffic, the weather, the service, and her date. 

Look over the categories and decide if you’re guilty. Could also be the two of you didn’t click. Too bad, there’s never a survey people could answer after a date. Unfortunately, most would lie on it even if there were.

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