Friday, May 30, 2014

Eight Modern Rules for Dating

A recent article on Tango website revealed the eight modern rules to dating.
1.       Women want to pay according to the survey, 42% of women stated they’d pay the tab.
Really?  I find this hard to believe. Are they volunteering to pay the tab in order to get a date? Sharing the tab is an entirely different matter. Whoever pays for the date is in control of the date technically. This is a power switch because the woman wants to dictate the date.

Traditionally the man paid and planned the date. I ran this idea past a man to get the male POV. If he really wanted to go out with the woman, then it was okay. A woman he wasn’t sure about, he’d put it down to her being controlling and forget about her.

2.       Fifteen minutes is all it takes to decide if a person will work as a date. This means any time spent after the fifteen is a waste if the initial spark doesn’t occur.

I have to disagree. While, I liked my sweetie initially I wasn’t sure about continuing to see him until the third date. Dead certain by the fifth date. The first fifteen minutes of our initial date was spent ordering food. Is a person supposed to get up and leave after fifteen minutes making up an excuse about a sick pet?

3.       Don’t like your date for some reason, tell him.  Forget politeness, maybe your date isn’t picking up on that you don’t like him, share your feeling it will be a courtesy.

Disagree, dating is hard enough without receiving an immediate critique while on the date. Cutting the date short, a refusal of all future dates, refusing to accept a friend request or a thanks, but no thanks works better than a 10 things I hate about you list, especially in a public setting.

4.       Don’t go all the way on the first date or for several dates afterwards. There is no opportunity or reason to get to know each other. Often after the fateful one night stand, there are no future dates or they tend to resemble booty calls.

I agree with Tango.

5.       Follow up after a date is an expectation. Women usually like an immediate call or text by the next day. Men tend to wait three days as to not to appear too eager.  Lack of follow up indicates at least one person was not that impressed.

6.       Phone your date.  There’s a half dozen ways you can communicate with your date, but over 80% still prefer hearing your voice.

Agree. Each level from texting to status updates puts distance between people. Do you really want to share how you felt about your date with 300 online friends?

7.       When is the right time to FB your date? The younger the person the more likely they’d friend the date.

Keep in mind, how much of your love life you want to make public. One young dater confessed he scrolled through women’s profiles discovering their taste in music, movies, and favorite foods.  He also discovered their sense of humor or lack of one. He decided if they were down to earth or a drama queen. He managed all of this in a couple of hours of meandering through social media.  He explained it was the equivalent of six dates. He almost never went out with a female after examining her social media. He explained with a grin and a shrug that there was no need.

8.       Do stuff with your friends. It allows your friend to meet your date, but also allows you to see how your date interacts with your friends.

If a person is putting on an act, it is harder to keep it up with multiple people. Often it is good to see how he or she is with others before you get too involved.

Overall, Tango’s advice was decent even if it was meant for a younger crowd. Is there any item you violently disagree with?

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