Friday, December 31, 2010

My Dating Truths

The New Year is about resolutions. I think to decide what I want out of the next year relationship-wise it is best to examine what I have learned this year. This is what I have learned from dating so far.

•When I started dating one man, I became immediately attractive to other men.

•Men can be as nervous and clueless about dating as I am.

•Engineer types (i.e. nerds) need at least three date to prove themselves.

•I can be a femme fatale at 49. LOL

•Men worry about their weight, their hair, the skin elasticity—the same things that plague me.

•When men do bold things I admire them, but it doesn’t always equate into relationship material. A history teacher I met a few years ago on our first date offered to drive me to a home improvement store to pick up the blinds I ordered to prolong our date. Right in the middle of the oriental carpet section he swung me into a dance turn and dipped me back for passionate movie kiss. He got points for the wow factor, but never made it to the third date. He pretty much gave me everything he had on the first date.

•When men do weird things, I wonder until they give some long winded explanation. Then I smile and put it down as a guy thing.

•When men do clumsy things, I forgive them because I am a klutz. I almost feel an oneness with them.

•All the chivalric things a man can do including opening doors and pushing in chairs, I absolutely love.

•I am an absolute pushover for roses and chocolate.

•An out of the ordinary gift shows that the man thinks out of the box.

•A man with cats turns me off, but a man with a dog and a cat has possibilities.

•A man with a dog can be very sexy. (Okay, I’m a dog lover.)

•A man pushing a vacuum cleaner, especially, if it is mine is even sexier.

•Men can write wonderful emails and go silent on a date.

•Some men refuse to write emails, but can be a great on a date.

•Men who offer to help me with something that is perplexing me I appreciate! I realize some women hate this, but I have enough problems to solve on my own, a little help is very much appreciated.

•Men can be hot in any size or height. It is their attitude that matters. They must believe they are a prize. If they don’t believe it they can’t sell it.

•A man that can make me sigh is good, but a man who makes me laugh is better, but the one who can make me do both is priceless.

•You really can meet men at grocery store, library, post office, even school events if you’re open to it.

•I used to wonder about men asking me inane questions like what time it was when they were wearing a watch, but now that I’ve read enough books on dating I realize it is an attempt to strike up a conversation.LOL

•There are lots of datable professional men out there.

•Surprisingly, the men I meet want relationships as opposed to dating for fun.

•Many men are willing to attempt a long distance relationship. I’m not sure where they think it will go, but they do want to try.

•Younger men do ask me out even if I am not a member of the local cougar club. LOL

•Often there is nothing better than a hug to appreciate the subtle differences between male and female.

•I like the smell of Irish Spring soap on a man better than cologne.

•Getting ready for a date is a great deal of work, but the right guy makes it SO worthwhile.

•It’s working when we are both so lost in conversation that they close up the restaurant around us and we don’t notice.

•While I enjoy this time in my life of being somewhat irresistible I long for a relationship, but I am unwilling to settle.

•Trying to determine if a guy is relationship material takes time. Before I was only dating one guy so the assumption was the guy I was dating was relationship material even when he really wasn’t for me.

•Men will open the car door if you wait long enough.

•By preplanning what type of behavior I will not accept, surprisingly I’ve never received it. I’m unsure if I mentally telegraphed my list of no-no’s or am just dating a better type of man.

•Men don’t like whatever is easy. By being hard to reach since I don’t listen to my voice mail coupled with hard to date since my schedule is full, I’ve increased my irresistibility quota.

•Meeting a man somewhere makes for a much better date. There is never the misunderstanding that I am going to invite him in for sex. LOL

•Dating has taught me a lot about myself.

•It is okay if a man doesn’t have all the same interests as me. I seldom come across male writers who also teach and belly dance.

* Lastly, but probably most important, there are so many princes out there I am amazed I ever settled for a frog.

Tell me your dating truths. My next four blogs will delve into the aspect of dating like a man. I will also reveal if any of it actually worked for me.


  1. Great list. I might add these: You have to love men in general to be successful. I can find something attractive about most any man. Second, a smile goes a long way. If you even think about smiling, a man will notice and most likely say something. And, as you say, confidence is key. Everyone is drawn to it. Oh and one last thing. Beware the super-hot man or woman. The man doesn't need to settle down and the woman - generally spoiled. (sorry, generalizations; there are exceptions)

  2. Hi Carly,
    I've always stayed away from the superhot guys because I never felt right about them.

    As for smiling, a smile is a wonderful thing and can brighten up anyone's day. Thanks for commenting you made me smile.

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