Wednesday, April 2, 2014

Dating Weirdness

First, I should specify what some people regard as weird, other people think is okay.

1.       The Sneak Date - An associate or co-worker invites you out to a movie, concert, or event, claiming they invited a slew of other people. No one else shows.  

2.       The Embellisher - This person pads out their profile to impress or deceive. Is claiming to have one child, when in truth there’s five, as bad as listing your occupation as international spy on your profile? People would usually think the second was a humorous tactic.

3.       The skinny photo - Most people do wish they looked the way they did in high school. Posting an old photo won’t make it happen. You’ll just end up with someone who is close-minded enough not to go out with heavy people and isn’t afraid to say so. Post realistic photos.

4.       The Drive-by date - This is a guy or girl who only wants to meet at a coffee shop and specifies you wear a particular clothing item such as a red shirt. This allows the difficult dater to drive by and eyeball you before deciding if they will even do you the courtesy of stopping.

5.       The Email King & Queens - These people seem like great people and write great stuff.  The only problem is you never ever meet them. They could have crippling shyness or a spouse.

6.       The Persnickety Single (the female version) - This woman only will go out with men at least four inches taller and makes more money than she does. Instead of being a rarity, she is more of a staple in the online dating world.

7.       The Persnickety Male - He believes he deserves a supermodel despite the fact he’s no model himself.

8.       The Male Whore - He often treats dates like prostitutes.

9.       The Pitiful Date - This can be a man or woman who has endless tales of a horrible childhood, abusive relationships, and crazy bosses. He or she might even throw in a chronic disease and suicidal thoughts for good measure. Run fast.

10.   The Cheapskate - This is usually the man since he’s stuck paying for the first date. Even cheap men realize they have to shell out money for a date. If you don’t mind dining during happy hour to get free appetizers, sneaking in your own movie drinks, lying about your age to get discounts, then you met your perfect match.

11.   The Hallelujah Dater - It never takes too long to discover that your date is a walk down Salvation Highway when you thought you were going for pizza.

12.   Meal Dater - Some women have more interest in a free meal or event than their date.

13.   Unrealistic Expectations - When you reach middle age 40+, you look your age, but some people are horrified when their dates do too. Go look in a mirror sometime, especially in the morning.

14.   The Bait and Switch - A man who posts photos in his profile of him standing beside a corporate jet, expensive car, or yacht giving the impression he’s the owner. Sure, he’ll attract the gold diggers who’ll drop him as soon as they discover he isn’t the actual owner.

15.   Group Photos - Men readily admit that they look at photos before reading the profiles. Profile photos composed of numerous group photos is shooting yourself in the foot. First, it is hard to pick out the profile owner. It also implies that the person can’t stand to be alone, which may be off putting to more introverted males.

16.   Male Group Shots - The woman wants to imagine herself beside you. It is hard to do when your arm is wrapped around a buddy, an ex-girlfriend, or a Vegas showgirl. There’s a chance she thinks your friend is the guy she’s dating and is disappointed when you show.

17.   The Party Animal - Most people are anxious to make a good impression on a first date. The person who drinks too much on the first date is a party animal or more simply put, a drunk. The ultimate lure of wanting to look good in front of a desirable stranger wasn't enough to curtail the drinking. Get a clue.

18.   The Kissy Face Photos - No one looks good doing this. It is rather like those photos that make the dog’s nose look huge using a fish-eye lens.  A recent survey found men on online dating sites have complained about the kissy face photos because it distorts the female face and makes it ugly, not sexy.

19.   Social Media Snooping - Some people feel the need to tell everything they do via social media. It is an investigative tool. Don’t feel the need to give out your social media handles immediately. The downside is if things don’t work out you’ll have to disconnect or ban your defunct Romeo from contacting you.

20.   Cell Phone Monitoring - This is when your date or significant other is constantly viewing your calls or texts with or without your permission. This shows a lack of trust.

There are probably hundreds of others. Remember to not prejudge your dates, but to expect the best. Treat them how you’d like to be treated. People don’t automatically find someone they click with. Dating takes work. Having said all this, make your safety a priority. This applies to both men and women.

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